Baby G = 20 weeks!

I really can't believe that we made it to the official pregnancy halfway point, partially because I was constantly afraid something would go wrong before now and partially because 20 weeks always felt soooo far away.  But we made it and Baby G couldn't be healthier.

Our appointment was at 3:00pm and we fnished up at chemo at about 2:50pm, so we had to get moving pretty quickly.  Luckily my OB's office is literally right around the corner from the cancer center, so we made it right on time, albeit soaking wet from the nutso storm that was raging outside.  Think rain and wind making umbrellas unusable and car doors tough to open.  It certainly made our day that much more memorable.

The appointment kicked off with an extra long ultrasound where the tech measured measured just about anything that could be measured on little Baby G, including arms, legs, head, neck, bladder, heartbeat, etc.  We got to see the little guy or girl squirming around and looking pretty content in there.  It was such an incredible experience to share with Charlie, one that I will never forget.

We then met with Dr. Mulchandani to talk about how everything is going.  She said that Baby's hearbeat is great, everything is where it is supposed to be, and Baby G is even measured at 75-90% on size!  This is extra good news because chemo can lead to smaller babies and low birthweights.  It's very reassuring to know that despite everything that we're both going through, our baby is healthy and growing well.  The final good news Dr. M had for us was that all of my doctors (and I've got a lot of them!) are in agreement that delivering at 37 weeks is the best plan for me and the baby.  Even though it's 3 weeks shy of the full 40 week gestation, it is when the lungs (which are the last major organ to fully mature) are typically fully developed.  I was told by the materal fetal medicine doctors that they would feel comfortable delivering any time after 26 weeks, so to hear that Baby G will very likely spend no time in the NICU was such a relief.  There is still plenty of time between now and then for things to change, but, God willing, Baby G should arrive sometime around Valentine's Day 2012!

The ultrasound tech told us that the next big ultrasound happens at 36 weeks, so it was music to my ears when Dr. M said she wanted to see me for an ultrasound at 24 and 28 weeks to make monitor Baby's growth.  I was sad when I thought I'd have to wait another 4 months before getting see our baby ... I can't wait to see our little baby again, and so soon! 

We've stuck to our guns and still don't know whether Baby G is a boy or a girl.  It seems most people have very strong opinions on this topic, but I haven't regretted for one moment that we've decided to wait until our baby makes his or her appearance to find out whether we've got a his or a her on our hands.  I love the suspense, I love daydreaming about both possibilities, I love the speculation, I love that we can share in the experience that both Charlie's and my parents and grandparents had when they were expecting their kids.  I love it all! 

Finally, I have to say, I felt so much better after the second round of chemo than the first, and I know it was all due to the fact that we had such a great baby appointment.  I wish I could do it this way every time!

Now for the best part: ultrasound pictures for your viewing pleasure!

Ok, not exactly an ultrasound, but how cool is this? 
From my super thoughtful law school powederpuff team.  Thanks, guys!

Little tootsies

Thumb sucking

Profile and little fist

Close-up

Last but not least, Baby's face ... and chubby litte cheeks! 
Don't you just love him or her already?  I know we do.





Updates and news!

I can't believe how long it's been since my last post ... over a month!  Sorry about that.  I don't know where the time went.

Things are progressing well with my treatment.  The last of the steri strips that covered the dissolvable stitches came off and the scars aren't too bad.  Don't get me wrong -- I don't love them and they're taking some getting used to, but they're each about 3 inches long and will fade and shrink with time.

I met with my oncologist, Dr. Gradishar, who came very highly recommended from several people.  It was a short and to the point meeting, but I was able to (finally!) figure out my chemo schedule, which had been my biggest concern up to that point.  We have several important weddings this fall as well as the holidays, which made planning a little tough.  My first round of chemo will be on Wednesday, September 28 at 8am.  I go every three weeks until my last round on Wednesday, November 30.  This schedule allows me to make all of the weddings and doesn't fall close to holidays.  So I'm a happy camper.

I haven't been to a wig shop yet.  I've gotten several good recommendations and I know that I need to go sometime in the next two weeks.  But once I go, that means that chemo is real and rapidly approaching.  True to my procrastinating nature it keeps getting put off.  Maybe next weekend ... The wig is a precaution since chemo affects everyone differently.  But I think the smartest thing to do is get the wig and count on my hair falling out so that in the off chance it doesn't, it will be the loveliest of surprises.

Speaking of lovely surprises, big news: we're having a baby!

Surprised?  Welcome to the club!  My blood pregnancy test on the day I was diagnosed (June 16) was negative, and a short 3 weeks later we found out I was 5 weeks pregnant.  As of yesterday, I am 15 weeks (or, in non-obstetrician terms, almost 4 months) pregnant.

Before you freak out (believe me, we, including both of our families, have done plenty of that), the chemo that I will be undergoing is okay during the second and third trimesters.  In case you're interested in reading a little more about it, here is an article on the topic that we found very, very reassuring:  http://houston.culturemap.com/newsdetail/06-14-11-when-breast-cancer-and-pregnancy-collide-groundbreaking-new-study-gives-more-hope-to-cancer-children/

We've waiting this long to officially share the news because we wanted to make sure that the baby is doing well and that everything is progressing normally, which it is.  We also wanted to talk to my oncologist and develop a game plan, which we have done.  As a general rule, chemo and radiation should happen within 10-12 weeks of each other.  For obvious reasons, my radiation will have to wait until Baby Gough makes his or his big entrace into the world.  BUT my doctors don't want to delay my chemo for fear that it will give the cancer time to do something sneaky, so from the beginning everyone has been operating under the assumption that Baby G will arrive several weeks early.  With my current chemo schedule, I will be 26 weeks along when I finish my last round of chemo.  Add 10 weeks to that and I will be 36 weeks -- not even full term.  As my high risk OB has told me, my delivery date is going to be a moving target.  They don't want to deliver any earlier than the have to, but they also don't want to give the cancer yet another chance to do something sneaky by delaying the radiation.  My official due date is March 6, but I would imagine the actual day will be sometime around Charlie's 28th birthday, February 20, but time will tell.

As I said, things are going really well.  My first trimester was rough, to say the least.  It's a good thing Charlie is a shoe in for the husband of the year award, because I couldn't even look at anything but Eggo waffles and Taco Bell bean burritos for about a month, couldn't stomach going to the grocery store or anywhere that smelled strange, and was basically confined to the well air-conditioned areas of our apartment.   He was so patient and supportive and always willing to run out and get me Sunny D or applesauce or whatever sounded good to me at the moment.  It's been a slow road back to eating normally, but I am thankfully finally feeling almost like myself.  I've had 5 ultrasounds so far and Baby G is growing just fine wth a strong heartbeat.  One upside of this, ahem, complicated situation is that I am getting plenty of attention from both of my OBs, regular and high risk, which means lots of ultrasounds :)

The moral of the story is that this baby is an incredible blessing.  Two days before finding out the big news I was agonizing about what to do (ask my friend Katie -- it dominated our twice-per-year meeting!).  IVF or no IVF, that was the question.  I knew what the ultimate answer was going to be, i.e., no IVF, but it certainly didn't make the possibility or even probability of never having children of my own any easier to accept.  With this baby, I've never so profoundly felt God's work in my life, and I am thankful every day for this little, tiny answer to a prayer I didn't even know I would have to say.

Charlie and I are both very, very excited about this baby.  And I hope this explains why we've both been somewhat absent in the last few months ... it's been tough keeping it a secret!

5 weeks -- there's a baby in there!

9 weeks -- baby took surgery like a champ

11 weeks -- starting to look more like a little person

11 weeks -- little legs sticking up

15 weeks -- hey, Baby G

15 weeks -- can't wait to meet you in about 5 months, baby



The day we got the big baby news



15 weeks (and new short pre-chemo 'do)